Five for Friday: Rap Songs

I know.  It's Monday.  Sue me.

I have a love/hate relationship with rap music.  It's sort of like a guilty pleasure for me...I love to listen to it even though I know it's ridiculous.  And it seems to be getting more and more ridiculous the older I get.  And I can't decide if it's because I'm getting older or if it's because the music is getting worse.  It's GOTTA BE THE MUSIC, RIGHT??

I don't generally listen to rap music in the car and stuff.  But every now and again, just to keep up with the youngsters these days, I flip the radio over to my local R&B/Hip Hop station.  (Note to self:  write a blog entry about what this particular radio station considers R&B or Hip Hop or rap or just nonsense.)  On Friday I was feeling a little loosey goosey (get it out of the gutter...) so I flipped over to the rap station.  In ONE hour I heard the most nonsense that I've EVER heard on the radio...EVER.  It is beyond me why some songs get played on the radio.  I heard one song that had more words bleeped out than it had not bleeped out (bleeped in?  what is the opposite of bleeped out?).  I heard something like, "And (bleep) (bleep) rollin' (bleep) havin' a party (bleep) in (bleep)..." and so on and so forth.  Amazing.  (Note to self:  write a blog entry about when a song is just too "explicit" to play on the radio and how may bleeps should be allowed before the song needs to have a radio edit version, i.e. In Da Club by 50 Cent.)

So, today's Five for Friday stems from rap music.  Five for Friday:  ridiculous rap lyrics I heard in the time span of ONE hour (and this really could be a 50 for Friday...seriously):

THE YOUTUBE VIDEOS ATTACHED ARE NOT SAFE FOR WORK.  PLEASE DON'T WATCH THEM WHILE ON THE CLOCK.  THE LYRICS ARE EXPLICIT.

1. Lil Wayne ft. Gucci Mane - We Be Steady Mobbin.'  "big house, long hallways/got 10 bathrooms I can sh*t all day."  How effin' ridiculous is that?  I'm not sure I need to say anything else.
2. Lil Wayne ft. A MILLION EFFING PEOPLE - Bed Rock.  "I Love Ya Sushi Rolls, Hotter Than Wasabi, I Race For Your Love, Shake And Bake Ricky Bobby."  I mean, I love Talladega Nights, but I'm pretty sure it wasn't good enough to make it into a song.  Unless you're Lil' Wayne, I guess.
3. Birdman ft. Drake and, yep...you guessed it, Lil Wayne - Money to Blow.  "Yes i make mistakes that i don’t ever make excuses for/Leaving girls that love me and Constantly seducing hoes/I’m losing my thoughts i say damn/Where my roof go?/Top slipped off like Janet at the super bowl."  Oh dear.  Constantly seducing hoes?  A "Janet at the superbowl/wardrobe malfunction" reference?  What is this world coming to?
4. Trey Songz ft. Fabolous - Say Aah.  "I got a table waitin, what you think about a convo/And if you like it baby we can take it to the condo/And if you like the condo/We can move the party to the bedroom/Imma beat ya body like a congo."  The funny part about this one is that the rest of the song talks about "pocketful of money" and "poppin' bottles of champagne."  And you only have a condo??  Wow...high roller. :)
5. Jay Z ft. Swizz Beatz - On To The Next One.  "Used to rock a throwback, ballin' on the corner/Now I rock a teller suit looking like a owner/No I'm not a Jonas brother I’m a grown up/No I’m not a virgin I use my cajones."  Poor Jonas Brothers.  I think it's the ultimate insult to be mentioned in a Jay Z song. 

What is the world of rap music coming to??  What happened to just rapping about marijuana and stuff??  And now every song has to feature someone???  I'm so confused.  Next Friday...my five favorite rap songs.  I know you can't wait. :)

What ridiculous song lyrics have y'all heard lately??