On School and Age Requirements

Note to readers:  In this post, I'm going to brag about my smart kid.  I'm also going to bitch about school systems.  If you'll be offended by either, good day sir.

This is Jayna's evaluation from preschool.  FROM LAST OCTOBER.  Basically 2 months after she turned FOUR, she was able to do all the things that are in the "Before the age of 5" category.

(Sorry if you can't read this really well...bad picture.)

 

I'm not saying she is a genius.  She isn't Albert Einstein.  But she definitely works hard on her preschool work and she even works on school work at home.  Several times a week, she goes to our craft/homework area and "does her homework."  This can include flash cards, worksheets I've printed for her, practicing her handwriting, doing math problems, reading or coloring and learning to use scissors. 

And here's the thing:  I'VE NEVER TOLD HER SHE HAS TO DO THIS.

I honestly have never known a kid who wants to go to school so very bad.  Yes, most kids get excited when they start school or on the first day of a new grade level or hitting the milestone years like high school.  But I've never seen or heard a 4-year-old talk about school so much.  She wants to go to school...she wants to do homework, she wants to meet new friends, she wants to "not take a nap anymore because I'm too big," she wants to LEARN. 

Most recently, she told me she wants to learn more about the moon.  She's been obsessed with the moon for some time now, but it's been limited to seeing the moon, learning when you can and can't see the moon, the general phases of the moon and pictures of the moon.  Now she wants to learn "who lives on the moon," and what it's made of. 

Jayna is interested in learning so many things.  If she isn't learning something, she's bored.  She has basically completed a research project on the Stag Beetle that rivaled my research project on Algeria in middle school (except just without the written report).  It's fascinating to her.  She can tell you 75 facts about bees and she can tie her shoes.  She knows her address and phone number and that Indiana is East of the Mississippi River and can show you on a map.  She knows about the food chain and the circle of life and still cries about it on occasion. 

She's a smart, good natured, sweet, curious little sponge who wants a chance.  A chance to learn along with her peers in a Kindergarten classroom.

And she's being denied that chance.

I have talked to numerous people, had heated discussions with numerous people, sent numerous emails, submitted numerous papers for early entry, left numerous voicemails...all to be told by every single one that she is too young.  I mean, after all...a 4-year-old who misses the age requirement by 13 days is probably just not smart and/or mature enough to be in school.  I even had one principal tell me, "Well, I tested 3 early entries this year and only one made it through."  Well, you won't know if she'll make it unless you FREAKING GIVE HER A CHANCE.

Jayna had the idea to make flash cards of sight words...some she knew already and then there were some that she wanted to learn.  She now knows them ALL.  It's right around 125 cards.  Our neighbor told me that her son who is going into FIRST GRADE just learned many of those words at the end of Kindergarten.

The fact is that I can write here about all of her accomplishments for days.  I can tell you about everytime she uses a "big word" like "initiative" or "apparently" or "responsibility" the right way and beams with pride.  I can tell you about how when kids are mean to her that she "uses her brain and not her heart" and walks away from them with her head held high.  Yes...she still gets her feelings hurt, but she is hell bent on learning to control her feelings and emotions when it is necessary. 

I can write forever about her.  After all, I'm her biggest fan.  Her number one cheerleader.  But until SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, gives her the chance to prove to an unbiased audience that she can very well do these things and handle herself in a classroom, I'm just a gloating mother who will be judged for being a braggart.

Judge on, Internet.  I'm just a parent trying to do the best thing for my kid.

I am also fully aware of all of the pros to her not starting school this year.  Don't think I haven't thought about it.  I've also used several of those pros to ease the blow to her.  We've looked at the positives...one more year with her preschool friends and her favorite teachers, starting school with one of her neighborhood buddies and getting one more year before there are no exceptions to an early bedtime or a late dinner because we were out playing among others that we've kept to ourselves such as not suddenly falling behind and struggling to keep up.  And she's okay.  She's totally fine with it now. 

Chris and I are also fine...even though that doesn't really matter.  We both know her abilities and we were disappointed for her even if we didn't show her that.  But the long and short of it is that the only thing that matters is her reaction and her feelings about it.  Those thoughts and feelings are of course led by Chris and I and we believe that we are setting a good example for her.  We are showing her that there is absolutely NO benefit in throwing a 2-year-old fit about something that you really have very little control over (even though I've done that over this situation without her being around...and no, I'm not proud).  We've told her and shown her that if she continues to work hard and learn new things, that she'll be just that much more prepared when she DOES start school.

Our job as parents isn't just to teach lessons.  It's to learn them also.  Along with our kids, inside the classroom or out.  And we've learned so many lessons in the last 6 months...ALL THREE OF US.

Maybe school is just overrated.