Five for Friday: Happy Birthday To Me

This will be an interesting take on turning 30.  I have been grieving about turning 30 since I turned 29 LAST YEAR.  That should tell y'all something.  I don't want to get older!!

Elizabeth Kubler-Ross wrote a book called On Death and Dying that I had to read about 13 times in high school and college.  In it she identifies the ever-so-popular and mocked Five Stages of Grief.  For those of you with no sense of humor...I'll warn you now.  I'm going to mock them.  If you are sensitive on this matter, it may be a good idea to stop reading...right...now.

I have gone through these stages over the last year...only to ultimately accept that I have now turned 30 years old.  Here we go:

1. Denial:  Last May.  "I'm never turning 30.  Next year will be the first anniversary of my 29th birthday.  That way I never have to get any older!!"
2. Anger:  Last October.  "SHIT!! Now that I'm turning 30 I am REQUIRED to be an adult.  I had better GET MY SHIT TOGETHER QUICK!!  DAMMIT!  WHY DO I HAVE TO AGE?!?!?!"
3. Bargaining:  Last Christmas.  "So, since I'm turning 30 next year, I am allowed to buy myself Christmas presents."  February 2010.  "If I lose about 30 pounds and care a little more about my appearance then I can still pass for 29."
4. Depression:  May 1st.  "Well, $#*)! it!!  I HATE birthdays!  It is officially 4 weeks until I turn 30 and I just don't care anymore.  I hate the world."
5. Acceptance:  May 28th, 2010.  "Well, I woke up this morning.  That's a plus!!  I suppose having a birthday is better than the alternative.  I'm well-rested and have a great family and great friends.  I have a reliable job and a roof over my head and the best and sweetest little girl a mother could ever ask for.  My husband is loving and supportive and cares more than most husbands I know.  I'm a lucky person, even if I am 30."

See?  That wasn't so bad!!  I think that is a very truthful, accurate and light-hearted approach to the Five Stages of Grief.  What do you think?