ToT: What's in a (nick)name?

TOPIC:
Nicknames. Did you have one growing up? How did you get it? Do people still call you that? If you have kids, have you given them nicknames?

This week is stupid. 

I'm telling you that because that is my SOLE reason for posting late. 

I'm fighting the urge to go into detail. 

Okay.  I won't fight it anymore.

On Monday, I came off of a VERY busy weekend that would've been better suited for a person 10 years my junior.  I was very much looking forward to falling asleep on the couch at 8:15pm on Monday evening.  BUT...while we were playing outside with Jayna, we noticed that a giant limb had broken on one of our smaller-but-still-giant tree and was just lying in the tree. 

One phone call to the father-in-law later, I was sitting on the patio drinking wine and assessing the health of a tree.  That evening turned into a late night. 

We had lots to discuss that had absolutely nothing to do with trees.

Tuesday was harder.  And more stupid.  I was even MORE tired and sort of weak feeling like I was getting sick.  But I trudged on and went to work all day, came home to prepare some things for dinner, went to get Jayna, stopped by a cousin's house, and came home to a tree being cut down.

Who knew they were going to start THENEXTDAY?!?

So last night turned into a late night also.  A late night of trying on a very cool hard hat.

It had a face shield and ear muffs.  Seriously.  I want one of my own.

It also may have turned into a beer drinking night.  Not too much...just enough to make me not sleep as well as I needed to.

Dudes...I'm worn out.  I'm too old for this shit.  I.  Need.  Rest.

And that whole damn tree still has to be cut into firewood.  During a burn ban.  The irony.

Where was I?  Oh, right.  Nicknames.

I've had LOTS of nicknames over the years.  Some meaner than others.  Some I don't even want to write about because I know some of you (read:  Quags) who read will use this to your advantage. 

It's all in good fun, right?  RIGHT?!?

The very first nickname I received as a kid was Dani.  Just a shortened version of my name.  Shortened?  Yes.  But the formation of a boy's name?  Yep.  And I sure did HATE it until I was in late middle school.  People still call me Dani and it's almost what I prefer.  When I hear someone say my real name, it definitely gets my attention a little more because I'm not used to it.  Most of my family calls me Dani.  A few friends and their parents call me Dani.  It just stuck and I'm pretty sure it isn't going away.

The second nickname I received was Charlie.  My mom started calling me Charlie when I was...hell, I think it was out of the womb.  I've always been Charlie to her.  Charlie Goose.  I don't know how the goose part got in there, but that's a popular one too.  And now that I'm older, others caught on too and call me Charlie.  My stepdad calls me Chuck a lot of the time.  Even my dad calls me Charlie.  And I'll pretty much take this one to the grave.

When I was around 6 or 7, my neighbor Chad and his friend Jason nicknamed me Smelly Danielley.  And I wanted to KILL them.  They were much older than me, by about 8-10 years, and they just did it because I was Spacey Tracy's friend (Tracy is Chad's younger sister).  Tracy and I are still friends.  Little did I know, but Chad would become a very dear friend to me also.  I still love that guy and I am really happy that he has such an awesome family and life in general.  I'm not mad at him anymore...25 years later...but I'll still cut you if you call me...THAT nickname.  I'm pretty sure his immediate family are the only ones who have the rights to that one.

Fellow ToT blogger Michelle and I had interesting nicknames for one another.  Jiggler and Mathass.  She was NEVER addressed in writing as Michelle.  It was sort of like we  had code names for one another in case we got caught passing  notes...because we did it ALL.  THE.  TIME.  She is the only person who has ever called me that.  And she's the only person I'll allow to call me that.  Some things are just special. :)

In college, I became Dee.  I would even introduce myself as Dee.  All of my fellow Philo students called me Dee.  Teachers called me Dee.  Friends called me Dee.  I think the credit for this one goes to either my crazy Indian friend Mitesh or my crazy weird ass roommate Seth.  (Boy do I miss both of those guys, as well as that other pesky Chris Kohler).  The only people who did NOT know me as Dee were my family and the people I worked with.  Some of my coworkers called me Dee, but not very many.  I am still known as Dee to lots of people.

And then P.Diddy came along and we all had the "initial nicknames."  I became known as DeeDub by my School Age Care kids (a fourth grader named Lucas to be exact).  I was married by then, so my initials were DW.  The kids quickly made that into a hiphop name because I am so fly.  Or something.  This one has stuck to this day.  I got a message on FB a couple of days ago from a School Age Care coworker who didn't know my full name...only knew me as DeeDub.  So it took her EXTRA long to find me on FB. :)

Who knows who this is?

It had been noticed throughout my married life that my initials are DW.  "When you're in trouble, just call DW!!  Darkwing Duck!!"  And while it had been noticed, no one ever really gave me that nickname. 

That is, until RJQ came along.  RJQ is Jiggler's husband.  He is a dear friend to me.  Hell, their whole family is dear to me.  I love them all!!  One day he realized my initials were DW (probably at a bar with lots of alcohol involved) and said, "Hey!!  You're Darkwing Duck!"

And now, on occasion, he refers to me as just "Darkwing."  And everytime he does it, I laugh because he was pretty sure he was the first person to ever think of it.  And he thought it was the most hilarious thing EVER.  So, by default, it is now hilarious to me. 

Nicknames for my kid?  Oh dear.

Kids are so easy to give nicknames to.  Jayna's most popular nickname is just Jaynie.  I do call her J sometimes.  I call her JBird a LOT.  My dad calls her JayMad from her singing career days (read: when JLo was popular).  We also still call her Jayniac from her professional wrestling days. :)  Who knows if they will stick.  JBird will.  I'm pretty sure I'll never stop calling her that.  I'm sure her school friends will come up with something.  Those crafty little punks.

Do you have a nickname?  What is it?  How'd ya get it?

Now go visit the other ToT ladies!!  Use those sidebar links to the right!

A Random Update

It has occurred to me that I haven't blogged about Jayna in a long time. 

Here I got all upset about never blogging about anything else and then I just went and forgot about her. 

I'm sure she's all broken up about it. 

I tried to add a video to this post, but the video is too long.  I had a specific reason for uploading said video, but I guess y'all will just have to wait until I shorten it up (nearly IMPOSSIBLE to edit out my little JBird) to get the full picture.

Jayna is 3 years and almost 8 months old.  This makes me want to vomit.  I am having so much trouble with the fact that she's so smart and cute and she's going to grow up and continue to be smart and cute and I'm going to have to deal with that.  I don't envy myself AT. ALL.

She can spell up to 5 letter words now.  We work on this everyday and she loves it.  She loves that she can do it herself and doesn't have to ask me how to spell things.  She wrote G-R-I-L on her chalkboard in the kitchen last week while we were cooking dinner.  I said, "Jayna!!  You spelled 'grill!'  Great job!!"  She said, "Daddy's grilling the chicken, so I wrote 'grill.'"  Fair enough logic, I suppose.

She can now add in her head to a certain degree.  A few days ago I was explaining how the weathermen were 10 degrees off of what they said the temperature would be.  She quickly said, "Mommy!!  That's called math!  Kind of like 5 plus 3."  I played along and said, "So what does 5 plus 3 equal?"  She held up 5 fingers on one hand, three on the other and then counted them.  That's a wonderfully surprising first step at age not-even-4 to get the hang of adding.  Last night she was eating 8 jelly beans and 3 princess candies for dessert.  She looked in her bowl, looked up at me and said, "I have 8 jelly beans and 3 princess candies.  That makes....(paused as she looked up at the sky)...11!!!  Mommy!! I added my candies!"  She didn't even have to use her fingers!!  I gave her 3 more easy adding problems and she did them all correctly without her fingers.  On the 4th one, which was 9 plus 9, she gave up.  But again, great first steps here.

She is kind and polite and caring and emotional and loving and sassy.  A few mornings ago, her preschool teacher asked her a question that Jayna answers the same way EVERYTIME she's asked and Jayna responded with, "Why you ask me that question when you know the answer?"  She didn't say it like she was being a smartass or anything and even though I was laughing on the inside, I told her that that isn't a proper response when someone asks her a question.  Hilarious. :)

She loves to cuddle.  She regularly compliments me on my jewelry, my clothes, my hair.  She tells me I'm smart and she says her daddy is the best guitar player she knows.  She is a fierce fashionista.  She regularly asks Chris for different clothes than the ones he picks out for her in the morning.  She does it to me, too, but I just get frustrated and make her pick out her own clothes.  The results are pretty interesting when that happens.

She loves to tell stories.  Mostly about princesses getting married, but there are always some original elements in there.  Over the weekend she told Chris and me a story where "the rabbit turned into a froggy and then into a car...and then he stayed a car for awhile." 

She loves for Chris and I to tell her what we do during the day at work.  She's fascinated by it.  She'll ask me what I did and I'll start to tell her.  She'll almost immediately interrupt me and ask, "Did you type perials?"  That's her word for "proposal."  Her latest is, "Did you send any mailtypes?"  That's her way of saying "emails."  She's so cute I could die of the overload.

She loves to learn new things.  She knows about trees and photosynthesis and her immune system and phases of the moon and where the sun rises and where it sets.  She likes to do hands on things ESPECIALLY if you're teaching her these things.  She helped me plant the entire garden and also helps me take care of it.  She likes to help Chris build things and she likes to help me paint furniture.  She LOVES technology and learning about computers and how to use them and she can work the iPad better than Chris and I can.  She loves her learning apps and her playing apps alike. 

She helps me do things around the house to earn an allowance.  She sets the dinner table.  She helps me sort laundry.  She helps put dishes in the sink.  She puts the silverware away from the dishwasher.  She helps with Ollie.  And I don't MAKE her do any of it.  She wants to help.  She knows that 4 hands get things done more quickly than 2 and that we'll have more time to play if she helps out.  And while that isn't always true when you've got a 3-year-old helping me, I NEVER turn her down.  I let her help me do anything she wants to help with.

She loves her Ollie more than words can say.  She is kind and gentle to him.  He comes up on her bed everynight for family story time and singing bedtime songs.  And then she hugs and kisses him goodnight.  She helps with giving him treats and feeding him and letting him in and out to go potty.  She calls him "buddy" all the time.  It's very adorable.  "Come on in, buddy.  It's raining out there."

Her current favorite toy is a piece of multi-colored yarn that I gave her a long time ago.  It's probably 8 feet long.  She ties her swings together in the backyard.  She tucks the end into her pants and lets it drag behind her so "her prince can find her."  She made a bridge for bugs over the garden with it.  We loop it around the tree and the garden post to make a finish line for our races.  She uses it as horse reins on her glider.  She has had more fun with that piece of yarn than anyone ever should.  And I think it is the most creative and cute thing she's probably ever done.

Don't you worry!!  She has her troublesome points too.  A few weeks ago, she got 4 time outs in ONE WEEK because she wouldn't stop listening to an older little girl during rest time.  Jayna and this other little girl are the only 2 who don't take naps anymore, so they lay on bean bag chairs in the common room for 30 minutes while the other kids fall asleep in the nap room.  The older little girl kept talking to Jayna and telling her to do things that kept getting her into trouble.  It happened once and I promptly had a talk with her about peer pressure (although I didn't use those words) and about how she should ignore this other kid when it was time to rest, learn, be quiet, etc.  She said, "Ignoring my friends is mean.  I'm a nice girl."  It took an entire week to convince her that it was, in fact, the appropriate thing to do.  And now she regularly ignores this other kid even when she doesn't have to.  She told me earlier this week, "So-and-so wanted to play a game and I didn't want to play.  She kept asking me so I just ignored her.  She cheats anyway."  :)

She regularly gets whiny when she's tired.  She doesn't want to finish her dinner but still wants dessert.  She doesn't want to drink her milk before having lemonade.  She can throw a tantrum with the best of them.  She has an attitude, people.  Pure sass.  And she isn't afraid to use it. 

Overall, I love being her mom.  I get sad and sentimental at times that she will indeed grow up.  Doesn't every parent have that?  I worry about her.  I worry about if I'm doing the right thing.  I worry if I'm somehow making her grow up too fast or if I'm trying to keep her little for too long.  I worry about when she's a teenager.  I worry that I won't teach the right lessons or set a good enough example for her.  And I worry about really bad things too like kidnapping and things like that.  I...I worry.

I just want to keep her safe, let her flourish as her own little person and show her what it means to love and be loved.  That's all. :)

Drawing of Jayna wearing a crown while playing with her infamous yarn.  I'm the one at the top. 

Helping plant and water. 

 Helping build the garden.

Cuddles with the JBird.

I thought I was just putting baby wash into the bath.  Turned out to be bubble bath.  The ratio of bubbles to water was about 10:1.  And it was the highlight of the weekend. 

Planted garden.  Jayna dug in there more than I did. 

Playing iPad.  Probably Tiny Zoo.  That's one of the 2 apps she needs help with...mostly because I won't let her buy stuff from it.  

The wine cork plant markers that Jayna helped me make and place.  She loves to do anything crafty.

So that's what's going on!!  Consider yourselves updated!! :)

The Fate of Hookah

So...who's seen the Don Bluth kid's movie Anastasia?  I have.  Approximately 148 times.  It is a favorite in our household.  It is near and dear to my heart for a few reasons:

1. It got Jayna interested in MOVIES instead of 8 minute cartoons.  Yes, it's an animated movie, but it requires her to use her attention span to the max.  I love it.
2. The story of how we acquired it.  Jayna and I were on one of our many Target outings.  In the winter we'd go there just to get out of the house.  At the end of January 2011, it was raining and gross and cold.  I picked her up from school and we went and got a flushie (Icee for those that don't speak Jaynish) and some chips and I pushed her around Target in the cart just to look at things.  We didn't really have anything we needed to buy and I told her that we were just there to look and that we weren't buying any toys.  When we went over to the movie section, she promptly wanted out of the cart.  She's a good kid, so I let her out.  I was standing in CD aisle when I realized she wasn't right there next to me.  I knew she wasn't far, so I turned around and she was standing in front of the end cap.  She looked, picked something up and brought it to me.  It was Anastasia.  She said, "Mommy, this isn't a toy and it's only a 4 and a 7 and a 5.  Can I get it please?"  I thought she somehow mixed up the numbers so I went to the end cap.  She was right!!  It was only $4.75!!  So she got it.  And we've watched it more times than any other Disney movie that I paid over $20.00 for.
3. It made Jayna want to be a princess.  Some of you will think that's bad, but I'm here to tell you that when little girls think they're princesses, even for just a minute, it is the cutest thing that ever happens. :)

And so began the obsession with princesses.  IT WASN'T EVEN A DISNEY MOVIE.  If you have a little girl and you haven't seen Anastasia, you can get it pretty much anywhere for around 5 bucks.  It is a little scary in parts though, so take caution.  Jayna doesn't scare easily and she just laughs at "Raspukin." :)

There's a little dog in the movie that is named Pookah.  We've only known his ACTUAL name for about 3 months.  All this time we thought his name was Hookah...pronounced as who-kah.  Like the pipe.  We thought that because that's what Jayna told us his name was.  We figured she was right because she watches that movie atleast once a week to this day...over a year later.  Turns out, our suspicions were correct in thinking that naming an animated dog in a kid's movie after a tobacco pipe was inappropriate.  Oh well.  Whatareyagonnado?

About 3 weeks after she got Anastasia, Valentine's Day rolled around.  Her great uncle Norbert gave Jayna a little stuffed colorful dog holding a heart.  And of course she promptly named him Hookah and started taking him to school with her everyday.  So then I had to go through the slight embarrassment of her taking a stuffed animal to school EVERY DAMN DAY that was named after a pipe.  When asked why the dog was named that, I just gave them the explanation:  That's the dog's name in the movie Anastasia.  What?  You haven't seen it?  No, really that's the dog's name.  All that time his dang name was Pookah. 

Fast forward to last night.  I was lying in bed with Jayna talking about my day.  About how I do all sorts of cool stuff like send emails and answer the phone and type proposals and send them.  And all of the sudden, she sits up and says, "Mommy, I haven't seen Hookah in, like, awhile."  (Yes, his name is STILL Hookah even though we know the REAL name of the dog and yes, she STILL sleeps with that little dog over a year later.)  So she rummages through her bed and finds him at the bottom stuck between the backboard and the mattress.  She pulled him out and noticed that the little heart he is holding had come unsewn from one of his legs.  The conversation went something like this:

J:  (makes that breathing in really fast and really hard sound)  MOMMY!!!!!!  LOOK!!!!!
Me:  Yeah!  You found him.
J:  NO!!  MOMMY!!!!!  LOOOOOOOK!!!! (followed by intense sobbing and real tears)
Me:  Oh, it's okay Jaynie.  I'll sew it back on in the morning and it will be fine.
J:  No it won't mommy.  (still sobbing)
Me:  Jaynie, it's okay.  It just came loose.  We'll fix it just like we've fixed your other toys.
J:  It's not a toy!  It's HOOKAH!!!  And he's DEAD!!!!!   DEAD LIKE MORGAN!!! (even more intense sobbing.)
Me:  (stunned silent)

From there, I just picked her up and held her.  And squeezed her.  I didn't talk.  I cried.  So did she.  She cried for quite some time.  And I just held onto her.  It was the saddest thing that's ever happened to me since I've been a parent.

She finally settled down and I put her to bed.  And then I promptly left the room, sucked it up and got the sewing box.

I couldn't save Morgan.  I couldn't do anything to help him except give him love and compassion and not make him suffer anymore.  But last night, I saved Hookah.

I took him back into her room and she was still a little upset.  I handed him to her and she smiled a big ass smile and just simply said, "Thank you mommy.  I love you."  And she turned over to go to sleep.

You'll never be forgotten, Moe.  Not even by the little one who only spent a couple of years with you.


This parenting gig?  It's an emotional roller coaster.

January 2011 Six Pix

I've been putting off Six Pix for this particular month.  For a very particular reason. 
I'm still...STILL...dealing with the Morgan's death.  It doesn't get easier.  I still cry sometimes when I think about it.  I still miss him horribly.  He was a part of my life for 10 years and that doesn't just go away.

I can finally look at these pictures and atleast not completely lose it.  I thought for months about deleting all of them.  I felt like they were sort of morbid pictures.  I've since come to my senses and realized that they provide a sense of closure for me.

This was Jayna's final goodbye to Moe on January 7th.  She didn't understand, of course.  She asked where he was as soon as she got home from school.  She still asks about him from time to time and tells random people at random times that he "went to a better place where he can fly." :)

After I dropped Jayna off at school that morning, I came home before taking Moe to the vet and finished crocheting this cowl.  I had to occupy my mind for the 2 hours before his appointment.  It is my favorite thing that I've crocheted to date.  This one was for KT, but I'll be making myself one this winter.

This is the last photo that was taken of me and my first child.  I love you, Captain Morgan.

Chris, Ollie and Moe.  Family is who you make it.

The very next day, January 8th, was my stepdad, Roger's, retirement party.  We surprised him...and it worked!!!  He had NO idea! 

This is my sister-in-law, Summer, drinking 2 bottles of champagne.  This picture just makes me laugh.

What did YOU do in January??

Thoughtful Thursday: Katy M.

This will probably be the one and only time that I completely call out a friend on my blog by an actual first name and last initial.  I mean I don't want the whole 5 readers that I have stalking her...which you'd all undoubtedly do if I told you her last name.

I'm doing this for a few reasons: 1.  She doesn't like attention drawn to her, so I'm trying to make her extremely uncomfortable as I will post a link to this entry on Facebook.  2.  She deserves to have her name here.  She's been extremely supportive to me during the Moe sitch regardless of the fact that we rarely see one another.  3.  She helped me in a way that she'll never understand.

I've known Katy M. for 10 years.  I worked with her all too briefly when we were in college.  Then she went back to her hometown which now just so happens to be my hometown.  And through the magic of Facebook, we are now back in touch.  Small world, huh?  We didn't get too many opportunities back then to hang out as she had many friends who were way cooler than me and we were both busy with dicking around college classes and homework to really see one another.  We did go on one double date with our respective beaus to see the movie Hannibal.  Wildly romantic, I know.  That's just how we roll.

As you all know, I've struggled in every sense of the word with my situation with Morgan.  He was my first child.  He was the first living thing that I was responsible for keeping alive.  That's a tall order when you're a college kid with a complete lack of focus and have a million things on your mind.  But with the help of Chris and some others along the way, I successfully raised him to be the most wonderfully well behaved large breed dog that ever lived.  And I'll always stand by that.

Katy knew Moe when we were young.  She gave me behavior solutions that helped.  She gave me pointers on how to get him to eat his dog food.  And she was such a sweetheart when I became obsessed with my then 8 pound little puppy.  I'm not even sure if she remembers all those things, but I sure do.

Katy follows my blog and is a Facebook friend.  We give each other shit through social networking, but I think we both wish we were better friends.  We have lots of the same interests and live literally 5 miles from each other.  We are both busy.  We are both socially awkward without our Braveweiser.  But I think we understand each other to the point that we'll eventually get there. 

Katy had nothing but supportive and heartwarming things to say when I posted or wrote about my struggles with Morgan.  She was there to the very end when I couldn't even see straight through all the heartbroken tears.  But she also knew that I needed space.  I'm not sure how she did it, but she just knew.  She just knew.

It needs to be said that my family and my close friends that I see on a regular basis and even ones that I haven't seen for years were also outstanding during this time.  I recieved numerous cards and messages reassuring me that I did what was best for Morgan and that he was in a better place.  Laura brought me a latte and a very nice card that brought the tears the day we put Morgan to sleep.  KT was there through all of this too.  She has listened to me go on for HOURS about my dog.  My mom talked to me about being unselfish in Moe's time of need and told me that I was doing a very good job of that.  There were so many of you all that played a role in my grieving that I'd never be able to mention you all.  Just know that I appreciate every single message in any form that I received.

Last week I received a Facebook message from Katy asking me if I'd be home over the weekend so she could bring me something.  We eventually worked out a plan that she'd let me know when she was coming and if we ran into one another, great, but if not she'd leave whatever it was she had for me hanging on my door.  I assumed it was a photo frame for a picture of Moe.  That was all my brain would allow me to think.  And I was partly right.

There was a flat box in the bag also.  It was cardboard and I was confused.  And when I opened it:

Katy hacked my Facebook and blog pictures and had a calendar made entitled "A Year of Moe." 

There aren't words.

There are, but they won't do the situation justice.  I guess I can try.

The thing about this calendar isn't that it was photos of Moe.  It wasn't that it was from someone unexpected.

It was because someone understood.  She wasn't asking me how I was doing.  She wasn't telling me that things were going to be okay.  She wasn't trying to put her message into words like I am now. 

She understood, just like she had through the entire situation, that I just needed someone to acknowledge that this whole thing wasn't about me and my well-being.  Someone to acknowledge him for all the outstanding and wonderful things he did for me.  For his family and for his friends.  It needed to be about him.  And she got that.  Somehow or another, she got it.

And I've turned a corner.  I've stopped going to bed at 9pm because I'm overwhelmingly tired of hearing myself think.  I can now focus on other things.  I like to run again.  I put more effort towards everything in my life.  I feel like a better me.  Like I've come out of a haze and I can finally see clearly.  She made me realize that regardless of how many friends I think I DON'T have, I actually have an amazing support system that will help me through life.

And, most importantly, I can look back on Morgan's LIFE and see all the GOOD things that happened instead of only see his DEATH and all the BAD things that accompanied it.

Thank you, Katy M.  You are quite literally a lifesaver.

2010 In Review Monday: Jayna's Favorite Songs

Jayna definitely has her own taste in music.  We do help her along, but she will hear a song and stick to it.  It is sometimes annoying...you know, listening to the SAME EFFING SONG literally 15 times in a row in just one car ride.  But it's very cute that she likes songs other than "Twinkle Twinkle Little Star" and such.

Her favorites for 2010 are as follows and are in no particular order:

1. Alligator Pie - Dave Matthews Band.  She still loves this song and will ask for it from time to time.  She calls it "the pie song."  If you listen closely you can hear a dog barking in the background at the beginning of the song...and that is why she likes it so much.
2. Honey Bee - Tom Petty.  Chris plays this on the guitar sometimes and she totally freaks out.  "Mommy...listen!!  What is it?  IT'S THE BEE SONG!!!!"  All while jumping up and down and smiling ear to ear. 
3. I'm Not Calling You A Liar - Florence + The Machine.  This is one of her newer favorites and she knows LOTS of the lyrics.  I worried at first because on of the lines is "I love you so much I'm going to let you kill me."  BUT....how long will I be able to censor music for her?  She's too young right now to ask questions about what it means and it actually sounds sort of like "kiss me."  So Chris sings it that way for her.  She does know lots of the lyrics and will dance in her carseat to this song."
4. Shake Me Like A Monkey - Dave Matthews Band.  Again...some questionable lyrics, but she really just loves it for the "stackophone."  :)  Oh, and "Everybody get together...gonna make love SHINE!!!"
5. I'll Stand By You - The Pretenders.  We played this for Jayna from our wedding CD and she called it "the marry song" for the longest time.  She seriously knows EVERY. SINGLE. WORD. to this song.  All of them.  Better than me.  And she thinks I'm singing it.  HA!!  She's got another thing coming if she thinks I can sing like Chrissy Hine.
6. Icky Thump - The White Stripes.  You should see the head bobbing that goes along with this!!  Hilarious!!  She also likes to say the name of the song.  It's pretty cute.
7. Dog Days Are Over - Florence + The Machine.  Pretty much any song with a clap track is a hit in Jayna's head.  If she can clap to it and get 5 or 6 words right, she's happy.

What were your favorite songs in 2010??

Melancholy Monday: Four-legged Family

This is Part 1 or a two-part series about my dogs.  Part 1 goes to Morgan because he has seniority.

I have 2 dogs.  If you don't know that about me, then you haven't visited here nearly enough!  The problem with having 2 dogs and a punk is that the dogs very often take a back seat to the punk.  Yes, I just referred to my child, my 2-year-old sweetie pie, as a punk.  But in the very nicest way possible.

At first, I didn't have much guilt about my dogs being second in line.  My reasoning was that they are still well taken care of, have everything they need and more and they live better than alot of humans.  They are an integral part of our family, but our time is short and it is mainly shortened when it comes to them.

The fact of the matter is that they need more attention.  They need love and they need playtime.  Where will that time come from?  Out of my rear end, naturally.  The same place that all my other time needed for things (and money too) comes from.  But it has to be done.

Captain Morgan is 10 years old.  That picture was taken last month.  Until this summer, you'd have never known that he was 10.  He was playful and active and demanded that you toss a few tennis balls for him on a daily basis.  And while he still does that, it's half the amount of tennis balls and it takes double the amount of time for him to fetch.  He is the most lovable and sweet giant dog that ever lived...until you mess with one of us.  And then he turns into a scary black dog that will eat your face off.  Seriously.  Ask that guy in Bloomington who tried to hold me hostage or something.  He'd tell you.

I don't like to think about my life without Morgan...he's been a constant in my life for 10 years.  That's almost as long as I've known Chris.  And it's one third of my life.  But I MUST think of my life without Morgan.  Because that day will inevitably come and I'd like to think that I'll be a little more prepared for it if I begin my preparation now. 

This summer marked the time in Morgan's life where he started to feel his age.  He has slowed down to about half his speed.  He sleeps about 18 hours out of the day.  He wants to be alone most of the time.  He isn't mean in any sense of the word...he just likes his space.  He still loves us and he loves Jayna more than he loves us.  He is extremely tolerant of her antics and would protect her with his life.  But he now knows his age.

This is why it's more important than EVER to devote more time to him.

I could tell millions of stories about this dog.  Like the time he ate something dead in a creek and was sick for 3 months.  Or the time he ate an entire bag of Doritos and then turned the bag inside out to lick all the stuff out of there.  Or the time he stayed lying in the back seat of the car with the door opened and never got out for 10 minutes while we chased Oliver.  He's goofy and silly, but serious all at the same time.  He really has been the best dog that I could ever ask for...and he really is my best friend.

August Six Pix

August was packed full of fun times, so sticking to just six pictures was difficult.  These, no matter how embarrassing, are my favorites because 1. they sum up the month and 2. they remind me of good times.  Here goes:

1. 
   This is my favorite pic for August.  At the beginning of the month, we converted Jayna's crib to a toddler bed.  She loves it!!  She is very good (for now) about staying in it and she feels like such a big girl!  And now I'll be so happy when we can get away from toting the pack and play everywhere when she can sleep in just any bed!  I think I am just as excited as she is!!
2. 
   This takes number 2 because it has been A MILLION YEARS since I went out with people and acted this goofy.  In this picture, KT and I are showing Chris our "sexy faces."  Yeah.  Okay.
3. 
   I adore this picture.  Jayna doesn't like the sun in her eyes...and we'd forgotten her sunglasses that day.  She asked for mine.  And, of course, I gave them to her. :)
4. 
   This was not only Jayna's first time on a horse, but also a first for Chris!  She loved the pony and I'm sure she'll ask for one for Christmas.  And then I'll send her to talk to daddy.
5. 
   When Butterfly the Clown told Jayna that she had to leave, this is the face we got.  Jayna was less than happy that her new friend had to go back to Smilesville.
6. 
   This is from the same night as the "sexy face" picture.  We had a blast that night with KT, Amber and Erica (who had just gotten back from Afghanistan).  We went to high school with these girls, but hadn't seen or talked to them except for Facebook in about 10 years.  We all got along great and drank too much and acted way too silly.  I have so many random pictures and memories from this night that it is still hard to piece together.  Chris was hell bent on making sure that the ketchup was in EVERY picture...and he almost succeeded.

What did YOU do in August??

Check your baggage at the door.

This post comes with lots of baggage.  If this post were going somewhere on a plane, the baggage check fees would cost way more than the actual plane ticket.  I'm just saying.

Y'all know I have issues.  Serious ones.  If you think I don't have serious issues then you don't know me.  Once again, I'm just saying.

The whole "baggage" metaphor really works here because I can use it in two ways.  I *could* write this post and leave out all the feelings and dark and twisty stuff.  I *could* just write about how I went to the Christmas gathering on my dad's side of the family for the first time in 9 years and how happy people were to see me and meet Jayna, etc.  But...that's just not me.  I *could* leave all the baggage that accompanies this post up there in my noggin.  But I just can't do it.

I am compelled to write about the feelings.  The dark.  The twisty.  The emotional roller coaster that is reconciling with a part of your family with whom you were once fairly close and then a bomb dropped.  The hurt and disappointment that came along with my own family choosing someone else over me.  And on my wedding day?  Well, that just really twists the knife that was already in my back...

I won't tell that whole story here.  I could actually write a book about it...that's how long that story is.  I will say that going to this gathering was a big deal for me.  I had prepared somewhat of a speech for the moment when someone in the room brought up the fact that I just "showed up out of nowhere" after almost 10 years.  I was ready for the condescending looks and the silent judgment that often comes along with that side of the family.  I was prepared to leave in tears.  I didn't go in on the defense, I was just prepared.  I.  Was.  Prepared.

We went.  I made the actual decision to go only one hour before we had to leave.  I rode in the car the entire way there with a knot in my stomach.  And the knot moved to my throat the moment we walked in the door. 

Everyone was actually genuinely happy to see us.  It was...unexpected.  I did expect a few people to be outwardly happy that we were there.  But some...I expected some to just continue to judge.  But that didn't happen. 

Everyone left their baggage at the door (see?? two times in the same post!!).  We left the past in the past and celebrated in the name of reconnections and happiness.  And we had a good time.  I caught up with aunts and uncles and cousins.  It was very eerily like I'd never missed a year of being there.  My dad and my grandma were just ecstatic that we were there.  Jayna enjoyed herself and got to meet some new people, including some new kids.  All in all it was a wonderful time...much to my surprise. 

These are all the children of my cousins and, of course, my own kid.

Chris helping Jayna open gifts from my dad and my aunt and uncle.

Chaos in a very small house...

Jayna got lots of toys!  She got a laptop computer thingy that sings and helps her with shapes and a singing book from my Aunt Bev and Uncle Rusty.  She got the Little People Play 'n Go School and the Elmo Giggle Cell Phone from my dad.  The cell phone sings the song for Elmo's World, so she loves that!!

I can say that going and reconnecting was a big relief.  A weight lifted.  And all that preparing?  I"ll save it for next time. :)

Happy Holidays, Vol. 2

All in all the holidays were awesome this year.  I loved Christmas!  I usually think of Christmas as a chore, what with all the decorating and shopping and going here and there and whatnot.  But this year Jayna made it wonderful!!  No really...no sarcasm!!  This Christmas brought back many GOOD memories of my childhood Christmases and it's good to remember good memories.  Not that I had lots and lots of bad Christmas memories or anything...just that with all the hustle and bustle, it's hard to find time to think about good memories from years ago. 

I forgot to mention in my last post what Chris and I (and Santa) got for Jayna for Christmas.  We got her the LeapFrog Tag Junior with some books, a Clickeroo Pet Salon (that I can't find anywhere on the internet and with LOTS of little pieces to step on), a set of wooden puzzles (that I also can't find on the internet), some play jewelry and some other assorted books and crayons.  Her favorite thing is the play jewelry that I spent exactly $4.00 on.  Forget the awesome (but fairly inexpensive) Tag Junior...she'd rather play with the jewelry.  She puts it on and takes it off.  And then puts it on me.  And then puts it on Chris.  And then puts it on our dogs.  And then puts it on her stuffed animals and baby dolls.  You get the idea.

After things had settled down at our house on Christmas morning, we headed over to Nana M's and Pappaw's (Chris' parents).  There we opened gifts (and Jayna was the designated present passer-outer), drank champagne and ate a good lunch.  Jayna napped while we visited and drank and cooked and such with Chris' parents and everything went well.  It's so nice when things go well.  While Chris' brother Steve and his wife Aimee weren't able to join us this year, they still sent Jayna a Christmas tree ornament and gave her a generous contribution to her college fund.  Nana M and Pappaw got Jayna an American Girl Bitty Baby (much to my dismay, but Jayna LOVES that doll), a LeapFrog AlphaPet Explorer and some other assorted pajamas, books and Sesame Street Paraphernalia that she loves.  She plays with her Sesame Street figurines (sort of like the linked ones) EVERYDAY.

Jayna and Nana M playing with Sesame Street figurines.

Designated present passer-outer

Reading Ten Little Puppies.  This is now our new bedtime book.  Check it out...it's an awesome book!

Opening her Bitty Baby.

Happy kid with lots of new things!

Jayna and Pappaw playing with the singing LeapFrog toy.

In the late afternoon, we headed over to Nana and Pawpaw's house (my parents).  While there, we opened gifts, ate a wonderful dinner and played the Wheel of Fortune board game with my nephew.   He is good at board games!!  For only 7 years old, he knows what he's doing!  Jayna got a giant toy box, Elmo Live Encore, LeapFrog Fridge Phonics and some other assorted clothes and toys from Nana and Pawpaw.  She also got an Elmo Purse (sort of like this linked one, but not exactly) and Elmo Jack in the Box from her Uncle Tony, Aunt Summer and cousin Anthony.  We had a great time!

Jayna and Nana opening gifts

A very excited little girl on Christmas Day.

Opening her LeapFrog Fridge Phonics toy.

Opening Elmo Live Encore with Nana

Discovering just exactly what this cool Elmo does.

The kid LOVES rolls!!

The day was great and Jayna (AND Chris and I) slept like logs that night.  And then we did it all over again the next day.  On Saturday after Christmas, Chris, Jayna and I went to celebrate Christmas with my dad's side of the family.  More on that in the next post...

The Big One!

Lots of things going on in life for the past week or so, but first thing first!!

Jayna is O. N. E!!!

Jayniac's party was a HUGE success. There were around 40 people there and everyone got along and made nice for the day and had a good time. Jayna was quite clingy to people she knew, so not alot of people got to hold her. She is also Ms. Independent these days and would usually rather navigate by herself than have someone do it for her!

She opened her gifts from mommy and daddy the morning before her party. We got her a guitar and a shopping cart. The guitar was for obvious reasons. Chris can't have a kid who isn't musical! And the shopping cart was so she can push it around and collect things in it like a little hobo. She has a stroller she pushes around and she tries to stack things up in it like her doll, her juice cup, dog toys and the remote. And it all just won't fit in the stroller!! She now has a shopping cart to pile up all her essentials and take them with her throughout the house.

She was very good all day and took her naps like a good girl. She even slept until about 3:15pm...her party started at 3pm. Only close family was there by then, so it wasn't a big deal that she slept. It actually worked out a little better because she went down for the afternoon a little late. She was a champ for the whole party!!

We didn't set up the pool because it was chilly for August. I think the high temperature for the day was 71...too chilly for the little ones to be half-naked and swimming!! We had yard games and everyone talked and mingled and such. We had fun!

She loved seeing all the people and she especially love the icing on her cake!! She seemed confused by the fondant Horton, but she laughed at him. She only really wanted to eat the icing. She could have really cared less about the cake!! Yummy...strawberry icing!!

Jayna got LOTS of presents including a big wagon from Nana and some interactive books from Nana M. Tiffany got her a barn shape and letter sorter that she LOVES. Layla got her a soft, fuzzy Elmo that she never puts down. Anthony got her a ball popper thingy that she plays with everyday. And Amanda got her a laptop toy that she's learned she can carry with her everywhere. She also got lots of pajamas...you know the story of the pajamas. She got tons of cute clothes that she's begun wearing because of the fall-like weather. Thanks everyone!! Notes are going out soon!!

Chris' stepdad Rick was grillmaster for the day and everyone ate lots of food! We didn't have alot left over...which is always good. The Nanas helped ALOT with everything. We really appreciate all of the people who came and brought things and helped set up and clean up. We thank you all for your hard work!!

Uploading all the pics I want to show y'all would take me hours, so I've created this handy collage. If you click on it, it will hopefully get bigger so you can see it better. If not, the pics are uploaded to Facebook and will be uploaded to Flickr (contact me for access if you don't have it) by the end of the week.

So, the first year is over!! I've enjoyed looking back through the MILLIONS of photos I've taken over the past year and I'm glad I have them!! I'll continue to take millions and share them with all of you. Here's to what's next!!

Jayna at 12 months

I don't really have anything specific to say. Jayna will be 1 tomorrow. I'm just not sure how I feel about it. Emotions are running on high...

She is so smart. I know that every mom says this about her child, but she really is. It is just amazing how quickly she's picking things up these days. She hears a word 3 or 4 times and understands it. She is beginning to imitate sounds more. She sings. She can make an "L" sound (thanks, Elmo!) as well as d, m, n, b, p, t, s, and k. And she's learning to ask for things also. Very encouraging. Makes me think I'm doing something right...if not by teaching her myself then by surrounding her by people who are a great help in her development. I can't take ALL the credit!!

She will be walking any day now. Actually she can walk, but she is still just a little too scared to just do it all the time. The most steps she's taken thus far is about 20. And then she loses her balance or gets scared and sits down. Pretty cute.

She's growing like a weed and regularly refuses food now. She is quickly developing food likes and dislikes. Something that she throws on the floor today she may eat tomorrow and vice versa. She LOVES noodles, peaches, rice, bananas, prunes and cheese...but not everyday. Somedays she will throw all of those things on the floor and eat broccoli and dried apricots. Goldfish are a new snack favorite. I'll say, "you want a fishy?" and she'll crawl into the kitchen and sit by the island.

She loves Sesame Street, mainly for the music. She likes Rosita, Elmo and Telly the best...mostly in that order. She will dance to anything that sounds remotely like music. She will sing her own tune to anything that sounds remotely like music. When Elmo's World comes on, she'll sing, "la la la...dat's..." and dance around. She's very cute.

She helps dress and undress herself now. I'll tell her it's bathtime and she'll crawl into the bathroom and try to take off her shirt. She also knows that her diaper needs to come off before bathtime too. She helps put on her pajamas and even brushes her own teeth and hair. Of course I have to do it over again, but it's still a step in the right direction. She knows the hair brush brushes her hair and the toothbrush goes in her mouth.

She waves bye-bye and hello.

She is very cuddly now. This is new. She will very frequently crawl over to me and lie down on my leg. She'll also lay her head down on my shoulder when I hold her. She loves to lie on the floor with a pillow under her head...and for Chris or me to lie down next to her. She'll even take her blanket and lie down next to Ollie. And he is just ecstatic about it!!

She is attached to a blanket. She sleeps with it and tries to drag it with her wherever she goes. We don't let her take it everywhere...it pretty much stays in the house and sometimes in the car. She doesn't throw a fit when we don't let her take it. She okay with leaving it...but NOT for bedtime!!

Her new favorite activity is throwing dog toys in the dog food and water. ANNOYING...and messy. She plays basketball with tennis balls and Ollie's water bowl. Yuck. And she thinks this is the funniest thing that can ever occur.

She stopped using her pacifier almost 3 months ago. I'm not sure if I ever mentioned that.

She drinks whole milk now. NO MORE FORMULA!! HOORAY!! We are, however, having a problem getting her to drink milk out of a sippy cup. She just refuses. This will be a long and rough battle, I'm sure.

She LOVES the outdoors...rain or shine, cool or HOT. It can be 95 degrees and she doesn't care. She sometimes cries to go out. Not just to swing, but just to sit in the grass on a blanket and play. She loves to pick grass and flowers and leaves. She marvels in nature...it's very refreshing.

She's growing up so quickly and I'm not sure what to do. I suppose I should keep taking photos and enjoying every minute I spend with her. She makes me smile, laugh, sigh, cry and she tests my patience. I love her more than I ever knew possible.

Pictures after the weekend...

It makes a man say damn...

***This probably isn't totally safe to play if you're at a public computer or at work or something. I say "probably" because you really have to listen to the lyrics and be diligent to hear the bad stuff.



I LOVE this song. And I actually had to do some research as to who sings it and what the actual name of the song is. And, as I often am, I was curious about what he's doing these days or where he is...you know, dead? Alive? Still rapping? Bagging groceries? Anyway, his Wikipedia entry is sparse and I've not the energy to search further. He apparently still raps but I suppose it isn't good enough for the radio. BUT...as luck would have it, his 2004 release The Love Never Dies is for sale on Amazon. Hit the link to hear samples of the songs. I must warn you...I listened to some of the samples. And I thought they were Ditty. That should tell you something.

So, listen at your own risk. Especially his new songs.

Mr. Boombastic

Another one from early high school. I can't decide if Bob Marley would be *proud* of this reggae or if he would be super-effin-pissed. I think it's a toss-up, but I'm gonna go with the latter.

I'm a little sad to say that I owned this CD at one time. I actually still like Shaggy...this song just makes me laugh. And laugh. And laugh. And laugh. And laugh. It will forever remind me of my next door neighbor's boyfriend, Alex.




Enjoy!!

Yay!! A New Oldie!!

This one is from high school as opposed to middle school. Funny. I STILL love this song. BlackStreet is rad, yo.

Color Me Bad??

No...COLOR ME AWFUL!! And LIVE!!



And let's not beat around the bush..."I wanna sex you up." I'm pretty sure that can only be interpreted in one way. Am I wrong here??

A few things about this song...

* I believe that this song may have been one of the front-runners of my generation (that had lyrics that were NOT up for interpretation) targeting teens to have lots and lots of sex. I am surprised that my friends and I weren't mating like rabbits.

* Or maybe it wasn't aimed at teens. The song does tell us to disconnect our phones. And we all know teenagers don't do that.

* "Tick tock to the heart you don't stop??" WTF?? What does that even mean? I guess we could ask Snow.

* This is the second song I've posted that has been on the Arsenio Hall Show. I'm not sure what that even means, but I'm pretty sure I don't like it.

Happy listening!!

And if I ever...

...hear this song again, I'll still like it. I adore this song. Enjoy!!

(I can't post the actual video. Youtube has disabled embedding. I'm sure it's a legal thing...thanks Metallica for starting all of that legal shit with the internet.)

It's wiggity wiggity wiggity whack!!

This oldie goes out to my girl Laura...




Not only is it an oldie song, but it's on one of my ALL TIME FAVORITE oldie TV shows, In Living Color.

All I have to say is...some of them try to rhyme but they can't rhyme like this. What else needs to be said?

Jayna's Smilin' Face & Some Other Randomness

Some pics for your viewing pleasure (in no particular order)...

The disappointment of a rained out Red Sox home opener...

Jayna and me on Easter

Jayna and her bestest friend Morgan


Jayna, Anthony and Nana on Easter

Jayna and me finding Easter eggs

The Oliver relaxing

"Gimme that camera!!"

Katy and me at The Claddaugh for St. Patty's Day

Jayna being cute